State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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