on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
