therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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