oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
