There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
