I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
