Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Dignity is for republicans.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
