No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
