Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
