I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
