belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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