woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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