I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
