Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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