By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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