i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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