i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
