I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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