Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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