He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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