What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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