whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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