I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
