She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
