What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
