is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
What did we do last night that was yellow?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize