She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
