You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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