Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
My life is pants optional.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
