awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
we're making bets on your personal life
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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