So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
