so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
