yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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