my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
