AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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