Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
