FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize