...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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