I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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