I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
