I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
