Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
they're like a gay fantastic four
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
