Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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