he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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