Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
