Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Randomize
