Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
