if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
