Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize