Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
